Happy With Dead Last!!!

First of all, let me say that I am not an extremely competitive person. Being the best is great and all but it is not my goal in life. I was never Miss Popularity in school, I stunk at all sports, I never really won anything but my parents taught me to never give up so I always tried!!! So, I have tried many things over the years and I am okay with the fact that I am not the best at everything, not #1, but sometimes I think, "Can't I be great at something???" I am a good baker, but nothing to write home about. I can sing well, but am by no means phenomenal. I could save your life, but I'm not much different than any other cardiac nurse. I consider myself a decent wife and mother but I frequently let my emotions get the best of me, and those days I feel like I'm not so good at it. The point is that I wear many hats, but I'm not great at one particular thing.

As a Christian, how others perceive you is important in the sense that you should try and live like Jesus did, but I have spent the majority of my life more worried with what others thought of me than who I really was, and I still struggle with that. The truth is that we all fall short, we all sin, we are all not good enough at one point or another and it is easier to believe negative things that anyone says about you than positive. My husband frequently tells me what a great wife and mother he thinks I am but I don't ever seem to believe him as much as I do when "fair-weathered friends" tell me I am not a good friend b/c I don't call enough or the internet says I should have lost all that baby weight by now!!

I got a message this weekend from a dear friend I haven't seen in a while who was thanking me for a recent uplifting post I had put on my facebook page. She then said that she thought I was placed in her life to show her the type of wife, mother and friend that she wants to be. I was simply blown away!!! There are people in my life that I look up to but never have I thought of myself being a good example for a friend.

Titus 2:3-5 says: "³ Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. ⁴ Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, ⁵ to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."

The point is that we are always being watched by someone. Where I don't think we should consume our lives with worrying what everyone thinks of us we should concern ourselves with being the best we can be at all of the hats God has blessed us with and be thankful for times when we have touched someone's life. So, I am so thankful I have touched someone special in my life. I don't think we take the time to tell people these things...we are too busy competing with each other and ourselves!!! I am thankful for the wonderful blessings and women who have set examples in my life (momma, Mrs. Pam Corbitt, Kathy Ladner).

So, as I know I am far from perfect or being #1 at truly anything in my life, I am certainly fine with "settling" with being #2 or even dead last if that means I have tried my hardest, made God proud, and that my son and husband are happy ; )