I've been really bad about blogging lately. As many of you know, I recently have had a health scare and I can say my perspective on life in general has changed somewhat over the last several weeks. I had scans and a biopsy done and we were kind of in limbo for a while as to what was going on. The preliminary speculations, as well as first diagnoses were not good. I started to think of my life and what really mattered and here are my conclusions:
1-Some things I worry about in myself are SO stupid! I won't be on my deathbed thinking..."gee, I wish I were skinnier" or "I hate those freckles" so why should I obsess over them now?
2-Some things don't change...I cant control other people's opinions of me or how good (or even bad) of a friend they are...I can only control my own actions and I can choose to be happy with who I am. Honestly, there are some people who will never be there for you no matter how many times you've been there for them. So, I'm going to continue to be the type of friend I hope to have in spite of them ; )
3-I can't change my situation. Sometimes things just happen...things I can't help...people die, people get sick, people move away...stuff just happens sometimes and that is life...I am choosing to have a positive outlook despite my circumstances!!! Not to say I havent been worried b/c I was...I thought about if this thing really is that bad that maybe I wouldn't see my son go to kindergarten or he may not remember me...but I had to think...I can't control what is already going on...I can choose to have a positive outlook and fight like heck to live!!!
Fortunately, the outcome doesn't seem nearly as bad as we first thought, even though many of the details are a little still up in the air right now. All I know is that I am choosing to be positive and enjoy every second I have with those that I love...after all, we dont know what tommorow holds or how long those we have around us will be here!!! Not everyone gets an experience like this and I am grateful for the eye opener it has been for me...I know I won't forever remember feeling like everything I have is precious which is why I'm blogging these memories!!! I'm so fortunate that God has chosen to let me live yet another day and be blessed with an AMAZING family ; )
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